Snide Remarks & a Countdown

March 4th, 2011

~ The Nineteen Things I Love About Spring Countdown!! ~

Sixteen days to go until spring has sprung!!!

#16~ BUDS ON LILAC BUSHES!!!

This is one of the very early signs of spring, and BOO-YA(!) I have some!!  And this is NOT the only exciting part!

I planted my lilac bushes late last spring, and they were kinda rough around the edges.  Combined with the fact that we have really dense, clay soil here, and lilacs need loose soil and ample drainage (which water doesn’t drain well through clay… picture a clay pot… that’s what a hole in my yard is like!), I didn’t have a lot of hope that they would thrive.

Well, they HAVE!  I could see the buds from the sun room!

Lilac Buds

Lilac Buds 2

*  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *

I’m having a rough morning. Lemme ‘splain.

I connect with music.  I adore music.  When I can feel what a song is saying, it can easily reduce me to tears.

Mike… not so much.  He likes and listens to music, but he doesn’t connect with music in the same way I do.  The only song I’ve ever seen him choke up during was the wedding march they played when I came up the aisle.

He gets his shorts all in a bunch sometimes, and will go off bitching about repeating lyrics.  He’s absolutely irritated by phrases that repeat in songs.  Even the CHORUS!  I’m like… Dude, it’s the freakin’ chorus!  It’s SUPPOSED to repeat…

Well, anyway…

I don’t watch American Idol.  No hate mail please.  I don’t know the guy who was on Idol, whose girlfriend was in an accident and is now mentally and physically handicapped.  I heard about it by accident because he was on the morning show that was on the tv in the background as we waited for the weather to come on.

He sang this song.  This love song for her.  Singing, why would I leave her when she needed me most.  What kind of man would I be?

It was very touching.  Of course I was almost in tears, but when am I not?  And at the end, I thought… I don’t know how singers can do that.  If I had to sing a song about the depth of love I feel for my husband, I wouldn’t make it but a few lyrics in before I choked, and my throat closed, and I was completely overwhelmed with emotion.  I’m just LIKE that.

So with that thought, I turn to Mike, who’s putting his boots on for work, and I say, “I don’t know how singers can do that…”

He replies, “What?  Sing the same freakin’ words, over and over?” in a snide, sarcastic tone.  Then he launched into his speech on the topic.

I guess he was about due. I know he’s feeling really stressed out at work right now, and when he cracks up a bit, at least he does it in the same old predictable ways, with the same old predictable speeches.  It’s like, how he releases the pent up energy inside of him.

Sure beats most every alternative way I can think of where someone is releasing stress energy.

(As a side note, my Ego has just informed me that my writing this blogs sucks because I was still a little hurt and angry when I started writing, but through analyzing it in order to articulate it, I seem to have put out the fire, and will salvage this day and my attitude after all…)

Well, I find it hard sometimes to be all zen about life in general when someone… anyone… is being all snide about something that I feel so strongly about, but it’s that much harder when it’s HIM.  I know he’s not attacking me, because I am not that thing which he finds distasteful.  I am not the song or the lyrics, nor do they actually represent me in any way.  Still, it stings.

And I found it ironic that as I sat, suddenly overwhelmed with my depth of love for him, he chose that moment to run off at the mouth, making me feel small and stupid.  I know.  I CHOSE to feel small and stupid.  You know what I mean.

But that little bit up there about his releasing stress energy this way, that was brilliant. I don’t think I’ve ever actually consciously acknowledged that THAT is what he’s doing when he does that.  And he’s about  four weeks away from completely losing his head at work and quitting.  He’s only held it together this long because he needs a little more time to put the finishing touches on his own business launch.

So, yeah… he’s really stressing right now.  I’m glad that little bit of brilliance struck me.  That was the phrase that put the fire out and took the sting away.  It’s actually kinda funny.  It was almost hard to finish the story once the fire was out :)

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Following Synchronicity

February 15th, 2011

I came across a text file on my laptop a few days ago as I was cleaning up my desktop.  It was a list of affirmations I’d begun writing.

It was so long ago, I don’t even remember why I’d been writing them, or what I’d intended to do with them, but there they were.  It was a short list of only five sentences, but I was struck by their quality and knew that was why I’d held on to them.

So, I added the file to a folder of things I was keeping, not sure what I’d do with it, but knowing I shouldn’t throw it away.

*  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *

I mentioned in my last post that I’ve been doing a very short yoga routine (mostly) every morning.

Well, I lit a fire in the wood stove first thing, and laid my yoga mat out in the sun room this morning, which might I add was amazing and I intend to do it out there ever morning from now on.  But, I did my short routine, and then sat in the middle of my mat, in the sun, and spent my morning five minutes with Big J, meditating.

Afterward I jumped in the shower to rinse off and freshen up.  I went through my dressing routine and landed in my chair with a glass of ice cold lemon water shortly after.

As I sat here looking out into the sun room, I had an imagining.  In my mind, I saw myself doing my yoga routine, out there on the floor.  Like I was sitting here in my chair watching the room replay its memory of me.

And that was when it hit me!

The affirmations.  I should choose affirmations to say in my mind as I do yoga.  I’ve been catching my mind wandering a LOT as I try to focus on my poses.  Having an affirmation to focus my monkey mind on would be a gift on a few different levels.

*  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *

I love synchronicity.  Now I know why I couldn’t part with those affirmation the other day.  I really loved them, so I’m gonna share them.

Enjoy!

  • Today is a great day unfolding before me for my highest good!
  • I see synchronicity everywhere.
  • All coincidence is meaningful and specific to me.
  • I am grateful to be alive!
  • Everything is just right to create a miracle!

(P.S. I haven’t forgotten about making my routine into a short video. It’s on the front burner and coming soon!)

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How I’m Becoming a Morning Person

December 18th, 2010

A quick reminder that the Full Moon is on Tuesday, 12-21-2010.  This is a very special day as it is also the Winter Solstice (the shortest day of the year and first day of winter) and there is a full lunar eclipse!  What a BIG day!!

Join us for a Full Moon Group Abundance Meditation @ 11 am and 11 pm EST~  It promises to wield tremendous power in the coming year!!


One of the things on my list for the new year is to expand and write about my morning routine.

I want to start by talking about the importance of how you start your day.

When someone is really cranky, it is often said that they got up on the wrong side of the bed.  This is because we’ve always known that your day starts before your feet even touch the floor.  The thoughts that flood your mind upon waking are the thoughts that are going to shape your entire day.

How I used to start my day~

*Smack* down onto the alarm clock.  Sit up.  If I don’t, I’ll go back to sleep.

Fumble around for my clothes.  Brrrrr is it cold.  Wrap in thick cotton ANYTHING I can find, and zombie walk to the kitchen.

Put the tea kettle on the stove and add coffee grounds to my french press.  Zombie walk over to let the dogs out.

Zombie walk back to the kitchen, silently grumbling in my head about how stiff I feel and how cold it is and how dark it is and how damn early it is.

Pour the water, then the fresh coffee.  Zombie walk to my chair and open my laptop.

Squint.  Sip.  Sigh.

How I want to start my morning~

Reach up and click my alarm off before it even sounds because my internal clock is spot on.

Deep stretch and a moment of complete appreciation for my body, my bed, my husband, a new day.

Rise, dress and head to the kitchen for a glass of cool, fresh water.

Roll out my yoga mat and actually DO some yoga.

Sit on my yoga mat and meditate/morning prayer for a few minutes when I’m finished with my yoga.

Brew up some righteously wonderful coffee…

Post my quote and Spiritual ponderings for the day on Lilypad Paradise.

You have the most say in how your day is going to go when you first open your eyes in the morning.

About three months ago, I started taking a more active role in my waking moments.  As soon as I realize I’m awake every morning, the first thing I do is stretch my body out in a huuuuge stretch, and then I contract my body back into a little ball.

Then I feel my bed.

Not with my hands, but with my entire being.  I notice the warm, softness of my sheets against my skin, and the weight of the heavy, cotton comforter that covers me.

I notice the hairy leg next to me and smile in acknowledgment.

I notice the smell of my sheets.

I notice everything I can become aware of.

This whole routine takes me less than two minutes.  It’s quick and easy and it puts a huge smile on my face before my feet even hit the floor.  I love it.

There was less zombie walk and grumbles.  When I got up, I had an appreciative thought on my mind so there was less room for complaints.

After about a month and a half of actively directing my thoughts upon waking, I decided to add onto this routine so I was also directing my thoughts after my feet were floor bound.  I was having such great success with just directing my thoughts for two minutes before rising, I knew that it could get even better.

Then on November 9th, I began choosing a quote to start my morning with on Lilypad Paradise.  It’s been a month and a half that I’ve been at that now and I am really loving it a lot.  When I get up in the morning, I actually look forward to the moment that I’ll be able to sit down and start my daily post.

Now, there’s almost NO zombie walk or grumbles.  By the time I’ve spent a few minutes in bed, basking in the beauty that is my life, and then headed toward my laptop where I get to ponder my favorite subject, I’m high on life, and ready for the day to unfold for me.

I’ve always wanted to be one of those people who wakes up in the morning happy.

You know, one of those God awful morning people.  One of those people who don’t need an IV drip of coffee strong enough to stand a spoon in to feel human in the morning.

I’ve realized recently that the main things that stands between me and them is that I believe it’s a pain in the ass to be like them, and I believe that a zombie walk to the coffee is the only way I can function in the morning.

I know these things are true for me only because I believe them to be.  It just never really occurred to me that I believed that, really.  It’s something that I’ve done for SO long.  A behavior that I have participated in for SO long… I just accepted it as the way it is.  It never occurred to me that I had actual beliefs around it or that it could be different.  That *I* could be different.

I suppose it’s because the zombie walk has always worked for me, so I never questioned it.  I had no need or desire to be any different.

Now, I have a desire.

I’ve nearly become a morning person just from the two small, regular practices I’ve been doing for the past three months, now I want to work on some morning meditation and some morning yoga…. PRE coffee.

Such a daunting idea for me.  I know I want it though.  It puts a smile on my face to imagine being up in the dark of the pre-dawn hours with my yoga mat, stretching my body out and warming and waking it up more naturally than just a quick jolt of caffeine.

I want to replace that first thing, cup of coffee with a nice cool glass of water.  Our bodies go into detox in the night as we slumber, and one great way to flush all the toxin buildup away is to drink a glass of pure water first thing in the morning.  This also gets your organs fired up for the day and gets your bowels moving (not the most pleasant topic, but certainly one that’s appreciated in the morning).

After putting a glass of water in my system to get things fired up, I want to spend some time stretching out and doing some yoga.  Not a heavy, sweaty routine of poses.  Just something fairly short and simple to get my muscles warmed up and get my blood flowing freely.

I was looking around youtube for something I can start with and found this routine.  It’s a very simple and basic routine and at only seven minutes in length, it’s perfect for a quick warm up in the morning.  This will be my jumping off point.

Who knows, a few months from now, I might be doing a full, forty-five minute yoga routine, happily.  But for now, I will start small and go with a glass of water and a seven minute stretch.

And as a final expansion of my routine, I want to have a seat on my yoga mat when I’ve finished my morning stretches and meditate.  I’ll start with five minutes.  I try to remember to say a morning prayer, but I often forget.  I want to add it right into my routine.

The solstice is only two days away now, so I’m trying to get all my changes organized so I’m ready to strike.  I’m a big believer in planning less and getting to it, more… but some things just need a little scheduling and planning, and this is one of them.  I need a few days of knowing what’s coming and mentally preparing for such a big shift.

I am really looking forward to it though.  Maybe a dry run on Monday morning….

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