Well, I got my camera back from Alan yesterday. Broken.
I blame myself.
When I gave my 15 yr old my digital camera to take on a field trip to Washington D.C., I knew there was a chance it would get broken. And that’s why it did.
Not because he’s 15. Not because his friends are stupid (even though they are). Not because he wasn’t supervised or because he was out of town and not paying attention.
It broke because when I gave it to him, I thought, “I think I can trust him. He’s fifteen years old! And if it breaks, I’ll just buy a new one,” and THAT is why my camera broke.
I tried to back-track and change the thought, but it was too late. It was out there. It wouldn’t have been too difficult to change that request around but in truth, I’ve been wanting a new camera. I was asking for what I wanted, even if society says I wasn’t. Yeah, that’s right… society. How’s that fit?
Well… according to what I’ve been shown and taught and raised with, I gave him a semi expensive piece of equipment to borrow. He broke it. I’m supposed to be really mad. I’m supposed to tell him HE has to buy me a new one. I’m supposed to lecture him and make him feel guilty and responsible. THEN I’m supposed to stomp around angry and complain at unsuspecting people. “You think YOU’VE got it bad, my 15 yr old broke my digital camera when I lent it to him out of the goodness of my heart so he could take pics while on his field trip…”
Right?! Isn’t that what the “Mother” role is supposed to do?
Instead, I knew as soon as the thought crossed my mind that I was going to be getting back a broken camera. How can I be mad? I wasn’t surprised. I was the one that asked for it. I put myself right in the center of the attraction road on that one. Besides, it’s a thing. It can be replaced. No worries.
I don’t think he expected me to be so understanding. He didn’t need a Mother Role to make him feel guilty. He felt awful about it. He apologized repeatedly. It probably even ruined part of his trip because I’m sure he spent some time dreading what I’d say when I found out. Poor kid.
I told him that my camera is about 6 years old and that he could contribute maybe $50 toward the purchase of a new one. I think it ran about $250 new. Divided by 6 years is $41.66 per year. I’d have spent way more than that developing pics in a year. Even though it worked fine, I’ve still gotten my money’s worth out of it.
On the bright side, it DOES still function. I CAN still take pictures with it. The view screen is broken so close-ups are out. I can’t see how far I’ve zoomed and such, but I CAN snap a pic… so it’s not THAT bad overall.
What are you attracting with your thoughts? You might be surprised.
~OxOxx ∞
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